Deaf or Blind?

I admitted a patient to one of the residential houses today who is deaf. It was an interesting experience and sent me back a few years time to when I worked for the Mental Health Center of Denver and worked with four different deaf patients, all of which also suffered from Mild to Severe Mental Retardation.

It also set off a thought wave that I’ve caught on several different occasions. If I had to experience being blind or being deaf, which to me would be the least difficult way to navigate the world?

This was a really easy question for my husband to answer – he would rather be deaf. He could not work in his field and be blind. He also would not be able to read books, work on a computer or any number of other things that he needs his eyes to do, but does not need to be able to hear. He also made a very good argument that it is much easier to introduce medical and scientific interventions that are more capable of replacing various parts of the whole system related to hearing sounds than interventions for most any part of the system related to sight. The eye is more complicated than the ear, which is really saying something since the ear is a very delicate and fine piece of work by itself.

I have to agree with him that in the modern world being blind is probably more of a handicap than being deaf. But, as I experienced today, the one thing that gives the strongest argument for “choosing” to be blind is that being deaf means a significant loss of the ability to communicate with the world at large. This means far more to some people than to others. I could not do the vast majority of my job as it is now if I could not hear and therefore easily communicate with my co-workers or my patients. At the same time, if I were blind, I could not do most of my job either. Too much hinges upon being able to quickly and easily navigate computers as well as be able to speak. Hell, nursing in general requires all five senses to be able to do a complete assessment, even as a psych nurse I use all my senses (though I sometimes which my nose weren’t involved…) and so I would have to conclude that if I were to be either deaf or blind, I would be stuck with finding a different career.

So, I stand where I have found myself every time I have evaluated this question – I have no idea. Do I give up easy communication, music, and the easy ability to have a general idea of what is going on around me, even behind me? Or do I give up colors, the ability to easily manipulate the technology of today, fewer bruises from bumping into things, and being able to see everything that is around me?

Today, I lean toward choosing to be deaf, but tomorrow I will likely say I would rather be blind. Honestly, it makes me appreciate more and more just how lucky I am to be able to correct my vision with glasses or contacts so that I can see the beauty in the world around me. I am blessed to be able to hear everything around me from the annoying hum of the TV to the gorgeous music in the background to the sound of my husband’s voice. I am blessed to have two legs of even length with feet with five toes each and two arms of even length with hands with five fingers. I have a heart and lungs and liver and kidneys and stomach and all my other organs that function normally and my brain is at least of average intelligence and capable of abstract and forward processing and thinking.

I am blessed in so many ways and I often don’t even think about it. Today though, I am aware of just how lucky I am and today I give my thanks to the universe for giving me this gift.

Advertisements

A good day and pictures!

Yesterday was a long, but good day. Despite only the “expected” things happening, it was still a very eventful day. The least expected thing about it was that I actually had fun playing with a camera. It is a “hand-me-down” digital SLR Olympus camera from my husband – he got a shiny new Canon 7D and didn’t want his Olympus to go to waste. So, person that has never really done much at all with a camera besides point it in the general direction of something and hope the pic comes out alright, was handed a camera that costs at least twice anything else she’s ever had. YIKES!

On the other hand, it was really interesting and fun. Everything from actually being able to easily the focal point and have more than a few zoom points to work with to being able to see how different things like a lens hood changes the way the camera reacted to actually getting some shots that look good just made it a great experience. I now have a new book on my kindle that will attempt to teach me what in the world to do with all the cameras options and fully take advantage of being in control over things like the aperture, shutter speed and everything else like that.

Image

I got some cool shots like this one above, which just were fun to catch.

Others like this one were much more about finally being able to get pictures of the pretty things that I’ve wanted to take nice pictures of for years and years.

Image

Mind you, I haven’t edited anything yet. All that will come after I’ve learned a bit more about what in the world I can do with the camera and with the pictures afterward. I’m hoping to be having more fun with this in the future. Maybe I’ll even share a few of the things I’ve shot and things I’ve learned here too.

I’ll start with the one term that I didn’t know about until recently. A lens that can take really close up pictures of small objects like, ahem, flowers is called a macro lens. The lens I was using for the above pictures isn’t a macro lens, but it is a pretty spiffy lens that can at least give a good go of it. Which, considering who was trying to make use of said lens, is actually not too shabby then. Maybe between the two of us a few nice pics will be had for all.

Pineapple…

I am currently eating pineapple, which is a rather odd thing for me to be doing since up to about four or five months ago the very thought would have been laughable in it’s absurdity.

I had been under the impression that pineapple (and coconut) were some of the most abhorrent foods out there and that everyone who liked them were crazy. This included many friends, all of whom agreed with me that I would most likely die if I were stuck on a tropical/desert type island just due to refusal to eat the local food.

Then my husband brought one home and was all sorts of excited to eat it together. Oh how bad I felt. I told him about my dislike, but because I hadn’t tried any in forever that I would be willing to try it that night. He was obviously disappointed, but was not willing to let me not try it. Fair enough… I was quite surprised to find that it wasn’t bad… Actually, the texture and taste had a bit of bite to them that I liked. I helped him finish everything that had been cut. It was quite amusing and I think he was more than a bit happy with his purchase at that point.

Suffice it to say, that is not the only thing he has convinced me to try again after several long years of saying nope, not going to try, not worth trying to me. It is however the one that I was the most against and the least likely to try. Yay for persistence from him and being willing to help me push some of my boundaries. He’s good man, and not in the Peanuts Gallery sort of way. 🙂

Dreams

I know I still have a post about religion(s?) that is in the wings, but I have not been in the right state of mind to write that one.

On the other hand I have been having some very odd and even disturbing dreams the last few nights. The overall themes have been of some sort of subjugation of myself and the community I consider myself a part of in the dream, fighting against those who are subjugating us, running away and eventually reaching something resembling safety, but still feeling the need to continue to duck, to hide, to run. As far as dreams go, these are pretty common for me in that I have had dreams with these themes for years and years. Just usually not so many in a row nor with the content of the dreams being so diversified.

They started four nights ago with the one that amuses me the most – a zombie apocalypse dream. In this case subjugation is just that the zombies are the ones with the power and they rule how it is that the survivors will live. The fighting was of course trying to kick some zombie arse and running away nearly always follows those same rules. The safety would be a larger community which had something like a normal life, just with huge ass walls and manned turrets and pretty much the modern version of a castle hosting the masses during a raid. A really, really long raid.

The second was based on a dream that I have had multiple times since I was young, only this time I was actually a young adult trying to protect not only myself, but also my “crew” and a bunch of younger children. Hiding, ducking, espionage, and more running were of course a part of it. It started up in a desert and ended down in a city built underground in a series of caves. I honestly have no idea how far in that one I actually got since when I was woken up by my alarm I was working on escaping from some sort of trap/prison I had found myself in. Great thing to wake up to, let me tell you.

There was another more based in “real” life, but I honestly don’t remember it as well. Compared to the other dreams anything that is based in something even partially resembling my normal reality is not really all that memorable…

And the dream I woke up from this morning was just weird. I was on some sort of alien, but still earthlike planet where there were regular people, golem-like people, and the people who ran everything, though I couldn’t tell if they were human or alien. They subjugated the regular people and used the golem-like people to basically make the fake world they forced the real people to work and slave in seem more real and encourage the Stockholm Syndrome to develop and be maintained with little to no effort on the part of the superior individuals. They could beat, abuse, and even kill people, but because of the behavior of the golem-like people, it was taken in stride and just accepted.

The last one is the most fascinating for several reasons – the first is that while I nearly always view my dreams as a third-person observer, it’s nearly always following “me” or whomever it is that I identify as in the dream. In this dream, I was actually following three different story-lines and mine was the least interesting. My husband actually had the largest role in the dream and was the one who realized what was going on and that something had to be done first. I also got to see what the superior people were doing, which was interesting from my third person point of view since I was aware of how all the parts were fitting together, but none of the people I observed, including the person I identified as me, knew more than their own parts.

Anywho, my husband saw what was going on, started a war, a real war, not the fake one that had been going on, and just walked out of the “approved” area. As soon as dream-me realized what he was doing (the escaping part, I was helping with the previous stuff) I followed him and we both left via our own methods. In the dream I was exhausted at that point, not for any noticeable reason and actually crawled for a bit before I managed to get up and walk and eventually convince myself I needed to jog, though I really looked like the zombies that I had been fighting in the first dream. My husband acquired a scooter which he immediately told me was only because he couldn’t find an actual bike and if I wanted to be picky I could walk. I should also point out that in my dream I had ended up hiding from the superior people (who were in the bodies of late-teens, there was something weird about all the adults being the golem-like creatures) and actually was watching them watch me because I couldn’t hide all that well and couldn’t move. I heard my husband and watched him go past, him realize what was going on and trying to decide if he would turn back around, but knew if he did so that we would both die. So I took advantage of my awareness that all of this was a dream and turned it backward a minute and managed to jump on the scooter behind him and we just barely got away. It probably helped that I blinked and suddenly we were on a steampunk/Firefly-esque space station. That was the safe place, though I felt like I still had to hide and try to blend in because they were still after us.

And in all these dreams I encountered many, many people from my life. Family, friends, co-workers, even people I’ve just passed by on the street. Usually my dreams are not so populated with people I know. All in all, I would say the last few nights have been very odd. I want to see what I come up with next, but at the same time, I know my sleep has been more disrupted by these visions and I’m already having enough trouble with being tired as it is… ah well.

So, if anyone happens to have an idea of where I should start with interpreting these dreams, that would be awesome. They’re just a bit too much for me to take all at once right now. Thanks!

Random Goings on of Life

I have been working on a new post and changed the subject line at least three times in the last four days. I just can’t seem to actually agree with what I’m writing more than ten minutes after I am almost sort of done writing it. So for now I’ll just comment on a few things that I have had going on.

First and foremost I met my husband one year and two days ago. Yes, we got marred prior to even being together one year, but we also had decided that we didn’t want to be with anyone else after only three weeks together. So the last twelve months has really been figuring out what our life together is going to be. We’re still working on it, but I get the feeling that will never really change. I couldn’t think of anyone I would rather be with trying to figure it all out.

ON a not so much fun or positive note, I have been experiencing an all encompassing sort of fatigue that doesn’t seem to be affected by how much I sleep. I know I don’t get the suggested amount of sleep per day, but even with that taken into account, I shouldn’t feel as exhausted immediately after I wake up as what I do in the middle of the afternoon as just before I actually go to bed at night. It has been so bad as to have me worried about driving, especially in the afternoon when I have been further exhausted by everything going on at work. Tis no good.

I went hiking with my husband (I should really decide if I’m going to call him by his name here or not) and another very good friend on Saturday and it was one of the best things I have done in the last few months. It wasn’t a long hike, just something nice and relaxing and gave us some time to just do something a little different and herald the beginning of our outdoor spring and summer activities. I hope to be spending more time doing things like that.

I am still working on doing some things for my QMAP classes, but hopefully I’ll be able to complete everything by the end of this weekend, including finding locations, so I can start teaching in May. It’s taken way too long to get anything organized and not only do I need the money, but I also want to start teaching.

Oh, yes, tomorrow will be an awesome day for two reasons: the first is that I will be off for a much needed mental health day. I can try to get some extra rest and do something other than work for a bit. The second is going to dinner at Beau Jo’s, best pizza in the entire world, with friends including a mum and grandma from out of town. I haven’t met the guests of honor, but I’m looking forward to it. Their (grand)daughter is awesomesauce, so I’m anticipating that they will be along the same lines. 😉

And I believe that is more than enough for the night. Not a particularly insightful post or anything special, but at least I was able to finish it and even *shocking* post it. Huzzah!

Perceptions

I wear glasses and contacts, which for most people isn’t that big of a deal because they put the contacts on in the morning, take them out at night and spend very little time with glasses on. I have the week long overnight contacts (huzzah for getting ones actually made for such things rather than just doing that because I’m forgetful and lazy) which means I often have to take them out long before it’s bedtime. What I have found is that my entire perception of the world shifts, enough so that despite the fact that I can see just as well, the world has moved. The floor is farther away or closer, objects I am reaching for are just slightly off from where my brain tells me they ought to be and my balance is off, at least for a few minutes.

Every time it always makes me wonder (once I’ve gotten over the initial vertigo-esque feeling) how much my visual perception of the world really rules how I think and act. It shouldn’t matter too much, right? Tell that to me when I knock a glass over or get another bruise from bumping into the door frame. To most though we all really only see the world one way for our entire lives. Except there are some intriguing theories and thought-games that I’ve spoken with others about. I dated a guy in high school who would always enter a new room with one eye closed. He would get three different impressions of that room, one with his left eye, one with his right and another with both eyes open. He never really said anything profound about what he saw or why it mattered, but just his attitude about it and why he did it were enough to make me think. Sometimes I remember to try it and I haven’t really had any major eye-opening, world shifting experiences, but it is still interesting to realize what one eye versus the other versus two will notice more or something different. Either that or just my attitude and ability to focus on different things each time I entered was different. *shrugs*

I know that how someone sees the world can make a huge impact. I’ve worn glasses since I was in 4th grade, but I should have been wearing them far earlier. The contrast between having to squint at anything distant and seeing clearly was immense. I went from struggling and getting frustrated with myself for failing at easy tasks at school, at home, in sports, even just watching TV, to being able to fully participate in all my life again. Every time I would go to the optometrist and get a new set of glasses I would experience that all over again and the wonder never really left me.

The thing that really stood out to me though was how much colors would change. I am not colorblind in the least, but without my glasses everything is so indistinct as to appear dull and even transparent sometimes. It has led me to wonder about how people perceive and process things like color. Do we all see the same colors the same way? We all learn that certain shades are called red, others are called blue, others green, etc. but that is because we have all been taught by others, by society that these names correspond with these light frequencies and that we all see everything exactly the same. What if we don’t? What if my “turquoise” is actually someone else’s “marine blue” but because we have been taught that this particular color is marine blue and this particular color is turquoise we still call them the same thing, even if they actually processed by the brain to be different colors.

The only reason why this is something that I want to know if there is something to it would be because I’m curious and I wonder if our different ways of actually seeing the world influence how we interact with it. Someone who has the ability to easily process the fine details of their visual world, colors are sharp, edges well defined, movement more obvious, maybe they are the ones who are more greatly affected by the beauty of the world all around them. People who don’t have those same perceptions, maybe they are more influenced by sound, or touch, or their own internal monologue and thus they will have different impressions, different talents, different ways of thinking, all because of how they process the same information.

For myself, I know that the differences between my glasses and contacts are both minute and extreme at the same time. I have pretty darn good peripheral vision even with glasses on because of band, but that is only for movement. Colors and actual shapes mean nothing to me if they are not in the part of my field of vision that is clear because of my glasses, so I process everything around me differently than what I do when I have my contacts and suddenly everything is clear to the same extent. And don’t even bother trying to talk or interact with me when I don’t have my glasses or contacts on and the lights are on. I am working so hard to “see” the world that I have a hard time focusing on conversations, on noise, on physical touch, on anything really. The way I interact with the world (or the lack of it) is something I am constantly aware of because of my visual deficiency, even though I have lived with it for fourteen of my twenty-five years of life. That has to have impacted how I think about the world, even if I don’t know any other way.

I challenge you to think about how your world changes, even with something as insignificant as walking into a room with one eye closed. How different is your world from so small a change? How many different worlds must there be if we all see the world with a slightly different interpretation, even if the differences are minuscule? How much would our interactions with others change if we were all aware of those differences? Would we even notice?

Gratitude and Work

I was surprised earlier today by the emotional reaction I had while discussing a case with a therapist at work. The most surprising thing about it was that the emotions I was feeling were a combination of surprise, relief, and the acknowledgement of the truth of her words on top of everything else I have felt related to the patient we were discussing.

The patient we were discussing is a particular difficult case. We’ll call the patient Susan. Susan has been a patient of mine for the last year. She has been in the hospital or a residential treatment facility for something like 8 out of the last 12 months, if not more. Most of the breaks between were no more than 1-2 weeks, if that long. She would be in outpatient treatment and after some time without the support of staff 24/7 she would have an episode of high depression and hopelessness and helplessness and attempt to kill herself, usually through overdosing on her medications. After a few weeks in an inpatient setting she would step down to the residential house I work with and be there for months. It was not only hard on Susan, but also hard on all the people who have worked with her the last year, myself included. I have felt so many different emotions regarding her and her case that I do not know that I could name them all or describe them all.

The thing about all of this is that her therapist, someone that I hadn’t met before because she is new to the center, and I met to briefly speak about Susan. Recently Susan had an episode where she felt hopeless and helpless again but managed to reach out to her therapist and myself. Her therapist took the opportunity to reminded Susan about all the people that care about her. Susan’s mother and son were not the only people she was reminded about, but also her psychiatrist and myself as well as all the clinicians at the residential house because her therapist was aware of just how much Susan meant to us and how much we wanted her to succeed.

She told Susan about all the people who care for her and Susan was able to recognize it and even helped her therapist compose an email to the some of her treatment team and her mother. I received that email and thought it was a great step for Susan, but hadn’t fully comprehended exactly why it was so important for Susan to compose it herself to some of the people who are currently helping her.

What made me realize just how much we had impacted Susan’s life was when her therapist told me today that se had recognized how much the people who had been treating Susan truly cared about her wellbeing and that Susan was able to see it too. That was why it was so important for Susan to write that email, why Susan was taking more steps forward in her treatment, why her therapist was working so well with the psychiatrist and myself; They knew that we cared and that we weren’t just going through the motions.

That was when I teared up and felt so many emotions that I could not process them all. I wasn’t expecting it at all. I am usually able to pull back and keep that professional barrier up, but it is rare to get that acknowledgement from someone who isn’t on the residential teams I normally work with. It brought up all the emotions I have had regarding Susan, plus some ones just regarding my work in general all at the same time. Most of all though was gratitude. Because I know that Susan is with a good therapist who can hear more than what is said, which I have found to be a rare talent even within the mental health field.

It was a very unique experience and I hope that I am able to learn from it. Just writing this here has helped me a bit, but I anticipate several more writing/blogging/journaling episodes will come around before I feel like I have processed through everything. I hope I will be able to tell Susan how much she has helped me to grow as a mental health nurse and that she will take that knowledge with her through her life and remember that she can make a positive impact whether she is the one being helped or the one helping. 🙂

Random Thoughts From Today

A list of several random thoughts I had throughout the day:

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I blog too much about the same sort of things. I need to change things up.

Wow, I do a lot more follow up on Mondays and take a lot more active role in the treatment of my patients. Or is it knowing that I’m going to be getting more things to take care of at work and knowing I need to be on top of things. Or it’s just a passing phase. That would suck.

I feel really sad for my friends. They lost a very sweet, young, and quirky pet this morning. I want to do something for them.

I’m catching up with some TED Talks on the Science Channel but was kind of annoyed last night. There were some interesting talks, but others were presentations from very biased individuals that don’t have all the facts or don’t want to give information about other ideas or theories.

There’s evidence that particular DNA codes have a strong influence on whether someone is more or less altruistic and/or humble. Need more information.

I have a patient that has an actual diagnosis of Dissociative Identity Disorder. This is fascinating to me and I will have to resist the urge to search her chart for more in-depth info about it. Maybe a post later about this?

I really want to take the MMPI for myself. But it does cost quite a bit and insurance tends not to pay for it because of curiosity. Sad panda days.

I wonder what it would be like to believe in God in the way that most of the people who follow a monotheistic faith do. There is so much here that I would like to explore. This deserves a blog all on its own. Noted.

It’s 4pm and I’ve totally lost all motivation for work today. I got done all the important things but there are still a few things that I should be doing. *sigh*

Martial arts lesson tonight was good. I really, really enjoy the learning the strikes and stances for Kenpo karate. Now just to work on my blocks and those damn katas. And I need to practice the self-defense things more. I stop to think too much rather than act. Bad.

Stupid cyst is still bothering me, though not so much with the pain. Now it’s nausea when I exert myself too much. Still can’t do the more interactive martial arts like grappling and sparring. Fail and a half.

Snuggling with my husband is the most comfortable place in the entire world. Nothing is better than feeling him so close whether he’s just relaxing or being silly and trying to make me react to the random things he does.

~~~~~~~~~~

There were many other things, and I had some other thoughts that actually could be blog posts on their own as well earlier this morning while I was on hold and driving, but I guess I will just have to hope I remember them later.

I have no idea why I thought this was worth blogging about, but it was a change of pace I suppose.

News, Politics and My Thoughts

First off, I apologize if there are any obvious spelling errors or changes in direction. My cat, Shadow, has determined that she will sit on my lap whether I want her to or not. Seeing as how my cats more or less determine what I am allowed to do while I am at home, this is not a big surprise.

Anywho, the point of this post is regarding my recent decision to listen to the news more frequently, primarily because I was tired of only finding out about things weeks after they happened and being completely uninformed regarding national and world news. It is hard for me to acknowledge that I don’t know a whole lot about important (or what seems important now) matters and I like to be involved in such conversations.

This has been both an interesting experiment and a bit frustrating depending upon which way I want to view it. It is an interesting experiment because I am able to take part in more conversations and feel a bit more educated about things that are going on. For example, today I was able to actually take part in a discussion with my father regarding the failed North Korean missile launch. I felt pretty good about it at the time and even now feel like my decision has already demonstrated benefits. It is frustrating because more often than not I only get to hear the morning and evening commute shows and they often will have the same news on repeat for at least a day, if not two or three. They even use the same sound clips from “on-the-ground” reporters, so there is really no new information and I get bored and will channel surf.

I am also disappointed in myself for not being able to tolerate listening to “right-wing” talk shows. Even when I try to commit myself to doing so just so I can understand what it is that people whom I may not agree with are hearing and what influences their thought processes I am unable to listen for more than a few minutes without getting disgusted by what seems to me to be logic fallacy after logic fallacy. At least with the NPR shows and hosts they tend to at least make some small attempts at bipartisan or even non-partisan reporting. Not too mention the fact that when they have guest interviews with people who identify as Republican or Libertarian or Tea Party or whatnot they don’t go off on some tangent or rant or ask obviously leading questions or whatnot. It seems far more “fair and balanced” than what I have heard from Fox News supported shows.

And then you have the benefit of the BBC news reports being aired at the same time as people in England get to hear it. I believe it starts somewhere around 8 or 9pm at night and goes through at least 2 or 3 am MDT, which is early morning for England. The stories that they report on are fascinating, as is the perspective that they give, primarily that it appears a news organization is capable of reporting with fairly low bias. I also get more world news via their broadcasts which makes me a happy camper since that was the entire point of this adventure.

The major downside though is my tendency to get flummoxed by the reporting that’s coming out of the national presidential/primary campaigns in the US. Both sides are irritating me, both sides are demonstrating just how out of touch they are with the general populace and the number of people in the general populace who actually agree with most of what is happening in Washington or at the local state level is starting to disgust me. It’s bad enough to have to listen to politicians try to dictate how I can live my life, but the number of people throwing their opinions as facts at me has also increased and I am just about done with it.

In the mean time though, I will continue listen and try to understand and engage in conversation because ignorance is not bliss and is not something which should be forgiven. Not today when it is so easy to make yourself informed of the goings on in the world and in the nation. I also don’t believe there would be many people willing to just go with what their neighbors or friends or pastors or politicians tell them about what is going on. Maybe, just maybe, we would be able to have real power to influence policies that actually reflect the changes in society rather than what society was like 10, 20, or even 50 years ago.

That may just be wishful thinking on my part though. In the meantime, I will continue to listen and think and discuss and work on very slowly encouraging others to do so themselves.

Gaping Hole

For reasons unexplained, every person in the world is born with a large, gaping hole in the center of their chest

This comic is something that I discovered a little over a year ago, around the time when I was trying to learn how to recover from a broken and damaged heart. It was actually one of the most healing things I have encountered to date.

You see, this was far better at explaining that there is beauty in even unsightly and incomplete things and people. This realization helped me to take a risk that I otherwise would not have taken, or at least would not have taken for several more months or years. I took the chance that someone could see past my damaged and (hopefully) temporarily unsightly heart, the jagged edges of that gaping hole. Maybe this unknown someone would even be willing to help me to heal those edges and re-discover how to live with that hole while filling it with ideas or concepts such as love, hope, dreams, and joy.

Taking that chance was well worth it. I found not only my husband, but some wonderful friends and even re-established older friendships and this crazy and odd feeling of being happy. Even when I am sad, afraid, frustrated, upset or even angry it is still a fleeting thing which is soon smothered by the love I have found. I’m still not sure how he does it, but it is one mystery I have no need to uncover.

I cannot help but wonder what others think of their own holes, what they choose to do with them. Are they satisfied with what they have managed to do or are they still searching? Do they even know? Are they afraid and waiting for something which may not happen? Will they find their own way to listen to the music of the wind? Have I?

I like to think that perhaps I have and that the sounds I hear are reflections of my life. If that is the case then I believe it is something like what you can hear from a Hardanger Fiddle, something a bit haunting and melancholy, but lovely none-the-less. Then again, that could just be the wishful thinking of a woman who still imagines that she has found her way into a fairy-tale where such things can happen. Funny enough, I’m okay with that. After all, I am the one who gets to hear what the wind sounds like when I find that perfect angle.